Leadership Matters!

Well as most of you know, these trips I wander off on usually have a story attached, and this one is no exception. I boarded my Southwest flight to Ohio and got myself all situated in an isle seat. As the rest of the passengers boarded, down the isle came a young man sporting a sideways baseball cap, the hooded sweatshirt look of a thug, and completed the ensemble with tattered, hole filled jeans. As luck would have it he chose to occupy the seat next to me.

We'll call him Eric, cause that's his name. He no sooner got seated, turned to me, and proceeded to unburden himself of the stress he was carrying. Seems Eric left Ohio about a month ago to go live with his grandparents, and attempt to get his life," back on track." Yesterday he received a call from his ex-girlfriend, whom he'd had a very short relationship with prior to departing, to inform him he was going to be a daddy. So he was on his way back to Ohio to be with his baby's momma, with no job, no skills, and no hope. Eric is 19 years old.

He then took focus off himself and commented that I looked very successful, and asked why I was traveling to Ohio. I told him I was off to a leadership convention, and asked him why he assumed I was successful. He said because I was well dressed, and was reading a book when he interrupted me. Then he asked about the leadership thing. So I explained some basics about leadership and then asked him what his plans were for employment when he arrived in Ohio, because it seemed money was going to be a priority with a baby on the way. He had none. So I asked him based on his comments;" if there was a corporation hiring for a good paying position, based on our appearances, who do you think they would hire if we both showed up for the job?" Smart kid, he got the point!

I noticed based on our conversation he's had a shift in priorities. So I asked him what was the most important thing to him the day before yesterday? He truthfully said himself. Then I asked him what was most important to him today, and again he was truthful and said his soon to be born offspring. So I told him I'd show him what a leader would do, because he was about to become the leader of his family. We took out some paper and listed his new found priorities. Then we discussed how he could manage his life to address those priorities. He admitted his future scared him, he wasn't used to being responsible. He'd dropped out of high school, crashed a car his grandparents gave him and lost his license. He then began to tell me the tale of woe that was his life. Dad was in jail, mom left when he was twelve and abandoned her children to go pursue a relationship with another man.

I told Eric he'd have a great story to tell when he finally did become successful. The sequence of success is dream, struggle, then the victory. I pointed out most of the success stories you hear about people always start with a tale of woe. Since he was deep into the struggle part, he was oh so close to his victory. It was time to manage his current life decision, and work his priorities. I noted he had awesome people skills, and those were very marketable, a powerful key to success.

Eric was also distraught because he feared he'd caused a fray in his relationship with his grandmother over leaving Florida to be by his baby's momma side. He felt she was overbearing and controlling when it came to his decisions. I explained grandma was a wise woman, and she'd seen others make the mistakes he has made. She knows the answers to success through experience, and sees Eric was straying from that path. She also loves Eric very much and it hurt her to see him err. I suggested Eric call grandma after he landed and ask her to be a part of his priority management. I was sure she'd love to be a strong influence in her soon to be born great grandchild's life. He agreed he'd like that, and would work to patch the bumps he's caused in their relationship. After all, a man in his position is going to need some allies.

Eric accomplished some great self realization on that flight. He's decided that leadership training will be a great addition to his limited education, and he's going to attend the next leadership open in Ohio to begin the process. He has all the tools to be a great father and hopefully a great husband, despite the failure of our nation's education to prepare him for life. In school he was taught priorities didn't matter, it was okay to be selfish. Nothing in his education guided him toward a successful outcome. God has been evicted from the school system, so there are no absolutes when it comes to a moral compass. Though condoms are distributed and the enlightenment of the student's sexuality is part of the curriculum, the consequences of not practicing abstinence is left unmentioned. Our government controlled and taxpayer funded education system has failed this young man to date, but a chance encounter on a plane ride to Ohio, might just be the beacon of hope that turns this mess all around. How many enter our education system and leave to find their lives a hopeless mess? Better yet, how many more will we allow to live without hope?

God Bless
Capt. Bill