Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Torah, Torah, Torah!!!

Being a busy travel holiday, and Americans not the happiest campers about the new screening process used to gain access to your flight, I have a solution. One thing "extreme radical Muslim terrorists" share in common is their absolute disgust with anything to do with the Jewish faith. A simple way to weed out these potential threats is to man each security line with a Rabbi in possession of the Torah.(The Torah being the five books of Moses, the entirety of Judaism's founding legal and ethical religious texts). We then have each passenger hold the Torah and swear he or she is not an "extreme radical Muslim terrorist" in possession of a bomb or any other means of harming anyone on the flight. They should also be asked to avow that Israel has a right to exist as a free and unthreatened state. The reaction will determine exactly who needs to be body scanned/cavity searched. Problem solved!

Now since our government nor the TSA is capable of thinking as poetically as I, defining everything in a literal manner, it's unlikely this foolproof policy will be taken seriously. So, since they won't take us seriously, we should return the favor in kind! WARNING!!! Use these lines at your own risk!

Sarcasm for the TSA frisking procedure....

Does this mean we're going steady?

You'd better call me in the morning!

You've got purty lips.

What no kiss first?

Slow down there buckaroo, shouldn't we do dinner first?

You could at least buy me a drink.

God Bless and travel safe!
Capt. Bill

No comments:

Post a Comment